Thoughts?

Okay, here goes another “all over the place and not the least bit spiritually deep or interesting” post.

Have you guys ever seen the little search box in the upper left corner of my blog? I had no idea it was there but it’s a handy little guy in case you want to find something from an old post. Hope that makes it easier if you’re trying to track something down, and if not, let me know and I’ll try and find it :)

Okay, I want to tell you about the AMAZING weekend I had this past weekend. I got to go to a True Woman Conference, and if you haven’t heard of Nancy Leigh DeMoss, you need to. I had spent some time with her for a radio interview the week prior and absolutely fell in love with her ministry minded heart. I finished her book “Brokenness: The Heart God Revives ” in one plane ride and I’m pretty sure I got snot on the guy next to me because I was a WRECK. A beautiful, humbled, challenged, grateful wreck. After I got home from visiting her ministry I told Todd I really wanted to sponsor one of the girls who works there (Meet Liz!) because they raise support instead of receiving salaries, and we are so overjoyed to get to be a part of their ministry in this way. And then I made a crazy, wonderful last minute decision to go to the conference in Dallas and caught a flight 2 hours later. I am so glad I did…what a precious time of worship and fellowship. I got to sit by (and have my picture taken with, thankyouverymuch) Priscilla Shirer, who is one of my Bible-teaching heroes.

And the most awesome moment of that was when the speaker asked us to turn to Zechariah and I broke out into cold sweats. Priscilla’s opened as if the hand of God did it Himself, and a light shone on the perfect verse as I tried to remember the song and play it cool. Anyway, it was fantastic other than that :)

If for some reason you might want to join me in raising support for Liz (I know, she’s a stranger, but she is awesome and you will be so blessed to share in her journey!!) let me know and I will fill you in on all the details. She’s a little short of her goal and sometimes strangers find amazing ways to bless others:)

I’m going to finish up my preparations for Relevant tomorrow and will head out on Thursday. Please be praying that I will do a good job of connecting while I’m speaking, and also that I won’t fall down or throw up.

And also, this will be my longest trip away from the girls (3 nights) and I’m really upset about it. Could you please pray for peace for all of us and safety for them? I so appreciate it. They will be in great hands but I’m a mommy and it makes me worry to be away…

(Awkward transition to next random topic)

I’m feeling like I’m either putting too much pressure for my kids to be doing chores or I’m not expecting enough. The girls will be eight in December, Kate just turned 5. So this is going to be a free-for-all but would you all be willing to tell me some things around the house you feel like are appropriate for different ages (running dishwasher, doing laundry, sweeping, cleaning rooms etc). I’m so curious what other people do!!! I’ve been wanting to ask you all about your thoughts on this and can’t wait to read what you write!

Sorry…too tired to try and make this post prettier  :)

much love,
angie


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  • http://twitter.com/debs2girls Debbie Long

    My girls are 10 and almost 13. The only things they are responsible for are..keeping their rooms clean, doing the dishes after dinner and running the sweeper every day. They also put their clothes away after they are washed, dried and folded/hung up.

  • http://www.karenisblessed.blogspot.com Karen

    I wanted to comment on chores. I also have all girls. I have raised one, have one teen almost off to college, and a toddler. I didn’t really give my older girls chores and the “reap what you sow” has real meaning to me now. I failed miserably because of my perfectionist tendencies. Instead of focusing on raising my girls to have a servant’s heart, I might have raised them to have a little bit of a stingy heart. I know I am forgiven and will be doing things differently this last time around. I love Courtney’s Women Living Well blog. Here is a link to what she says about chores. http://womenlivingwell-courtney.blogspot.com/2009/07/chore-packets-teaching-our-children-to.html

    I pray you have a peaceful trip and that your family is protected. Have a great time! Blessings!

  • Jakkiking

    I’m so excited to have accidently discovered that my not quite 5 year old can put the dishes away (except the knives) and sweep the staris. He’s doing it rather joyfully at the moment. I’m praying that the joy will continue for a very long time. I get my 2 year old to water the pot plants on the deck, needless to say she has a blast doing it.

  • Danandblake

    Angie- A fellow Tennessean here :) My 7 year old helps with… making bed, brushing teeth, feeding dog, helping put her clothes in drawers, she loves to help me fold towels and sheets, cleaning up toys, helping to clear the table after dinner, setting table for dinner, being responsible for book bag and lunch box, getting ballet bag ready for practice, etc…. We don’t get to all of it every day, and some things fall through the cracks we get home late, etc, but I try to encourage her helping as a philosophy of living in our house.

    I recently read an article on Focus on the Family that talked about “false self esteen” and how giving our kids responsibilities in our homes gives them a real sense of purpose and importance- that they are an important part of the family and that they help the family run! I believe that chores and responsibilities will change, but I hope to foster a sense of growth and maturity with my girls (and boy on the way!) that teaches them appreciation and where they understand that we appreciate their contribution to our family.

  • http://twitter.com/cseehausen1 Cheryl L. Seehausen

    My daughter unloads/reloads the dishwasher. We started that at about 6 or 7. She doesn’t always do a great job with the loading, but she’s getting better. She’s 10 now, and has to put her own clothes away after we fold/hang them. She also doesn’t get clean clothes unless she takes them to the laundry room. She makes her own bed, and keeps her room cleaned and vaccuumed.

  • http://busterandbecks.blogspot.com Becky

    I love my new laundry system. We have 4 kiddos and found the once a week laundry sorting to be tiresome. So, I do laundry whenever I have enough for a load, sometimes not at all on some days and several on others. But the cool part is that I have a labeled laundry basket for each of us. The 6 stack on top of each other and when the main laundry basket that gets clothes from the dryer is full I take all the six out and put them around the laundry room (I get creative, because ours is really small). Then I sort them. Then once a week, I give all the kids their baskets and they fold and put it away. Our 9 and 6 year olds help do the laundry for the 4 and 1 year olds. This is also great because when someone wants to find something of theirs, they can narrow down the search significantly and find it in their own basket.

    On the bathroom front, I still do those because I want them to be really clean, but I make the kids do them once in a while if they say they are bored. This kind of back fired for me though because they thought it was fun…

    I almost never empty the dishwasher anymore. They work together to do that. It really frees me up to feed the baby or tidy up elsewhere.

    And general household mess: We tidy up several times during the day so it doesn’t get overwhelming. Usually before meals, play time, bed, or when we are going to leave. They are so used to it they don’t usually complain.

    I can’t wait to see what everyone else wrote! I keep meaning to go back and read your post on helpful homeschooling suggestions too. :)

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_N62ZLICNSFKHGNIQFFFJC5HC2I Tara

    I have two girls, ages 7 and 4. My girls are responsible for cleaning up toys throughout the day when they are not being played with, unloading the dishwasher, setting the table, taking out the trash and putting in new trash bags, helping sort dirty laundry, and helping put away clean laundry. My 7-year-old is also responsible for making her bed everyday, but I still help my 4-year-old with that one :-) Also, we sometimes use cleaning toilets as a punishment for “potty mouth” (saying unkind or rude things). And don’t worry… you’re not alone. Some days I feel like I am an overbearing mother who expects way too much, and other days I feel like I don’t make them do enough. It’s a learning process, so just go with the flow and don’t be too hard on yourself!

  • Mritchie2

    my kiddos are not as old as yours yet — they are 2 and 1. :) My 2.5 year old has “responsibilities” — after each meal, he takes his cup and dish to the counter and/or sink and pushes in his chair. He helps unload the dishwasher and he loves THROWING the wet clothes from the washer into the dryer. Both boys help pick up and put things “inside” (that’s what they say as they do it) it’s proper container to clean up the toys. They know books go with books, things with wheels go together, and blocks go in another basket. Hope this helps… :)

  • Blackglasses

    i am so so so so happy to read that you love nancy leigh demoss too! she’s such a spiritual mom to me even though i don’t know her. if someone could bottle her gentle feminine spirit i’d totally buy it. ha! anyway, it just seems like you don’t hear about her as much as some other Bible teachers, and i think it’s wonderful that you would mention her ministry here. :0)

  • http://julesmpg.blogspot.com Julesmpg

    Cleaning the bathroom sink and counters, cleaning toilets, dusting and vacumming. Unloading the dishwasher and helping load it. Sorting their laundry and bringing it to you. You fold it and they put it away.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Lynae-Condit/627018836 Lynae Condit

    I found this chore chart to be really helpful. http://www.workingmom.com/age-guidelines.htm

  • Witheagerhands

    We always had to dust or vaccuum, sort our laundry, unload the dishwasher (and load our own dishes after each meal,) Windex any mirrors/windows, folding and putting away clean laundry, and “tidy,” up any room that we were asked. I don’t think we could have handled actual chemical cleaning of the bathroom or laundry until we were over 10, I’d say closer to 12.

  • Mnewell0293

    Angie, that is just totally awesome about your conference and sponsoring Liz. You are doing God’s work every day!

    I too am attending Relevant and have never been away from my children (also 3 of them). I will pray for your children and safe travels…if you do the same for me 8) LOoking forward to hearing you speak and I know you won’t throw up! Peace be with you….

  • http://www.thecorkums.com misslissa

    My older two (7 and 5) fold and put away their laundry and dust. The oldest knows how to switch the laundry from the washer to the dryer and vacuum. They both have been known to help put away dishwasher dishes and they set the table. They also strip their beds when it’s time to wash the sheets.

    My youngest (3) can put away categories of clothes. Like just his socks and then come back. Then just his underwear. We do it in stages.

    They all have to clean up their toys. Is that an obvious one?

  • Kellykrew2

    I didn’t realize Revive our Hearts is in Niles, about 40 minutes away from me. Life Action has been to our church several times and our pastor wanted my youngest daughter to audition for one of their teams! Nancy Leigh DeMoss is awesome – been in our area many times! Our pastor always says that the founder of Life Action (which was a part of Nancy’s ministry), was one of the Godliest men he ever knew!

    Chores – making beds, keeping their items picked up, always take their plates from the table, help set the table, sweeping (mine loved to vacuum), helping with pets, special cleaning tasks – dusting, windows, etc. When they got somewhat older, I assigned them each a night to cook. We had up to 10 kids in our house (foster parents). They loved to cook but the desserts they chose to make shot the entire grocery budget for the week!

  • Tammyakay

    Hi Angie,
    My boys are nine and we have been homeschooling for two years now.
    When we started homeschooling I began making my kids have more responsibility, especially in the chore department.
    My boys vacuum, keep their room, their bathroom, the kitchen, and keep the living room tidy all day long. Its their job. They sweep, vacuum, they have kitchen duties, and anything else that may need to be done. It kinda sounds like I work them a lot but believe me it doesn’t stay all that clean around here. We get slack but for the most part they do a really great job. My biggest hurdle when I first started making them take on more responsibility was and some time still is my lack of taking the time to train them the right way to do it. I would get so frustrated with them because they didn’t sweep the right way or left a dirty floor but practice make perfect! Well, its never perfect but they do get better. Taking the time to train is so very important. Another thing is let each child have their own responsibility. Such as loading the dishwasher. If one of your girls has that job let her be the one to always do it after lunch and the other one do it after dinner. They will get better if they do the job everyday. Don’t accept sloppy work. That is another biggie.
    I’ve written a book but I’m passionate about my kids helping me out. I have four myself and honestly if my boys (whom are also twins btw) didn’t help I would be one stressed out Mama much more than I am now. Blessings and good luck!
    Also, Managers of Their Chores is a great book to look into!

  • http://www.thefarmeralmanac.blogspot.com Shana

    One of the things that I have my 5yr old do is to use the Mr. Clean “magic eraser” on the baseboards. I just get it lightly damp, and let her go to town. It’s easy enough (if you don’t expect perfection).

    I also let me 8 yr old use the swiffer on the hardwood floors.

    No, not all the dust and not all the dirt are removed from the hardwoods or baseboards, but it’s a way for them to contribute.

    Just some thoughts….

    • Davidandnanci

      Please be careful with the magic eraser because children have received burns from the cleaning chemicals on the erasers. I was not aware of this myself until a friend told me to google magic eraser and burns. Hope you have a blessed day.

  • Annie

    First of all, I loved the True Woman Conference here in Indy, a mont ago. It was life changing and oh so good!! Now on to your question, my oldest daughter is 7 then I have 3 boys ages 5, 3, 2. These are the things I feel comfortable with them doing. They help me carry up their folded laundry to their drawers. Grace, my oldedst can even hang clothes. I also have her wipe down the sinks and clean the mirrors. They feed the dog and cat. My 3 year old gets all the trash from our little trashcans and dumps it into the big one in the garage. I have them bring me the dirty laundry from up stairs. My boys also have fun doing the sweeper and using the wet mop in the kitchen. Grace is starting to be able to help me with the dishwasher since she can reach the sink. They all take turns helping me with dinner and picking up toys. This is the first year that we have had a good routine with chores and it has helped me out alot. I am usually supervising them but by the 2nd week, they were able to handle them on their own. Good luck!! You are such a great mom, so I am sure what you are doing is great!!

  • Beckgrech

    Hello! My daughter is 11, but we started her at chores (in addition to cleaning her room) at about 8. Her daily chores are to set & clear off the table daily. She also has to wipe off the table after dinner. Also on the weekends she cleans her bathroom- we started with having her just use a clorox wipe and wipe things down. Now she is old enough to use some of the household cleaners. She also LOVES to mop & use the swiffer. What I found is that if you have any “special” tools…ie swiffer, clorox wipes, bathroom scrubber, ect. they find it “more fun”. Also, she started asking if she could help me when she saw me cleaning on Saturdays. Now its part of “our time together” to clean together. At 11, she still thinks its fun…most of the time :) good luck!

  • Hollie

    My oldest is 5 and he helps me with laundry, he can carry his and his little brothers basket of dirty clothes down the stairs for me as well as gather their clothes into the basket. He also helps me sort the laundry and helps me throw it into the washer and dryer, he also is now learning how to load the dishwasher and helps me unload it, he vacuums, sweeps and dusts as well. Our 3 year old mainly helps out with our 5 year old and is responsible for picking up his toys but we will begin to add more things as he gets older.

  • http://whatilearnedfromthewordtoday.blogspot.com Whatilearnedfromthewordtoday

    Angie,

    I’d so love to sound wise and give you some sage advice with regard to chores, but alas…I’ll be coming back to this post to borrow from the words of others.

    I really just wanted to tell you that you are loved, and that I’ll be praying for you this weekend. I wanted so much to be there, but didn’t realize that God already had this weekend set apart for something else. :)

    Although I have no suggestions for chores, the Lord did lay this on my heart today and I think it might minister to you as it did to me. God amazed me with this message!

    I was thinking of you with your sweet girls as I wrote it this morning. I hope it encourages you.

    http://whatilearnedfromthewordtoday.blogspot.com/2010/10/teaching-her-to-employ-her-spiritual.html

    Love to you today,
    Jes in Chattaboogie

  • Anonymous

    I will probably be the odd man (woman) out here. I was raised under the philosophy that you have the rest of your life (after you leave home) to do the mundane things of life like cleaning toilets, laundry, etc…so when you are child, be a child. I still had to keep my room tidy, clean up my toys and take care of my dog/cat but that was about the extent of it. I grew up with no hang-ups about my childhood and am a spotless housekeeper and don’t mind doing these mundane things of life now. I have 2 daughters, 14 and 8, who are being raised with that same way of thinking. They are responsible for the things I mentioned above and walking/feeding our 2 dogs. A time to be a child is such a few precious years of their life, why burden them with the jobs of an adult. They are awesome kids who come home and do their homework right away with no complaint (and for my older daughter that means 3-4 hours a night). They are the first to offer to help a neighbor, help an elderly couple carry their groceries to the car or open a door for strangers. My older daughter just recently volunteered her time to help paint a mural at a local children’s hospice. In my humble opinion, doing any type of volunteering does more to foster a helping spirit than doing housework. With no exception, all the people who I have met throughout my life who had younger siblings to tend to or more than just the basics of housework (ie keeping their rooms clean, etc…), grew up to resent it. They turned out to be not the greatest of Moms (cared for younger siblings while growing up and now wanted more “me” time) and don’t keep a clean house. I’m sure there will be people who will disagree with this way of raising kids, but I know my 2 girls will be productive and kind members of society when they leave my house.

    • Overrock6

      you know, that is such an interesting post that I am really going to have to think about. I was raised almost exactly the same way & you can read above what I do with my family. I do work with them so I’m not like the evil mother task master thing. thank you for sharing this as it has made me stop and reevaluate which is always, always good. thank you!
      Warmly,
      shea

      • Anonymous

        Dear Shea, Thanks so much for your kind comments. It really warmed my heart. It sounds like you are doing a great job with your child and definitely not the “evil mom” stereotype. Thanks again. Hope you have a wonderful day.

  • guest

    8 is totally old enough to sort dirty laundry and fold and put away clean laundry. Also to put away the clean dishes she can reach. Setting and clearing the table and wiping it down after dinner area lso good ones.
    5 is a little harder. She can learn to fold and put away the ‘rectangles’ – kitchen towels, washcloths, pillowcases and bathroom towels and always match socks. I’d be leary of letting my 5 year old have anything to do with dishwashing.
    My 5 y.o girlies is ‘in charge of’ putting away books and toys and shoes and laying out school clothes and watering some of the trees and plants in the yard.

  • Paula

    My boys (7 and 5) sort their laundry into 3 piles (lights, darks, and whites). They like doing it and enjoy having a “sock fight” which I ‘ignore’ for about 20 minutes, but they have fun with it. My 7 year old sweeps under the dinner table and the 5 year old empties all the little trashcans in the house (bathrooms, schoolroom, etc). They also pick up all the toys in the yard (balls, bats, etc.) and pick up their rooms each night before bed. I’ll spray the backdoor (all glass) down with windex and let them wipe it down (they like this) and I’ve recently discovered that I can spray down their bathroom with scrubbing bubbles and they do a good job of wiping this too!

  • http://hikingtowardhome.blogspot.com/ Sharon@HikingTowardHome

    I’m looking forward to seeing you at Relevant. will be praying for you, as you speak and go through the weekend, and will pray you don’t fall down or throw up. :-)

  • Erin@TheRohmanEmpire

    I am so stinkin’ jealous that you got your picture made with Priscilla! And I only have a 2 year old and 8 month old but my 2 year old helps “clean up” every night. He takes laundry to the laundry basket, puts his pee-pee diapers in the trash, puts everyone’s shoes in their closets, that’s all I can think of for now. But I totally agree that kids need a few chores.

  • Overrock6

    Hi Angie, I use Managers of Their Homes on this site
    http://www.titus2.com/

    detailed book but once I got the general idea I was good to go and the site offers pictures to use for non-readers. The glory of this system is the kids know what needs to be done day to day without me nagging. I have a 6.5 yr old who feeds the dog, dusts, puts away clean silverware, folds napkins, sets the silverware on the table, helps me stir food, cleans a cat box (gross, I know), sets out a clean hand towel in the restroom, etc. This isn’t all in one day but is spread out during the week.

    Good luck! Can’t wait to read what you do.

  • Michelle Shirkey

    You are an amazing mommy and woman of Faith! I am a single full-time working mommy to 4 kids. Ages 11, 8, 6 and 2. My kids do chores and they love it. Do not feel burdened asking them to help! I make it fun for them and let them listen to music while they are doing their chores. My 2 oldest unload the dishwasher and put their laundry up. My 6 year old carries his laundry to his room and I put it up. They also dust and vacuum. The main thing I ask of my kids is to just “pick up”. I started when they were very young, but I never let my kids go to bed with their bedrooms messy. Now, it’s a habit and they dont have to be told.

    The time away will be good for all of you – when you get home, they will all appreciate you more and maybe realize what all a mommy does do! Blessing to you and your sweet family Angie! I love reading your blog and think you are an amazing woman of God. Keep on keepin on and God bless :)

  • Tabitha Reuman

    If we hadn’t been on a twitter ban, I would have know you were here in Dallas. : ) I was at the conference and would have LOVED to meet you!! But it was an amazing conference and I loved all the speakers.

    We recently bought the Dave Ramsey Jr. Kit for our kids including the great books, and I have to say that I love it. My kids are 5 and 7 and they make their beds, clean their rooms, clean the playroom, empty but not load the dishwasher (with a step stool), fold and put away towels and clothes that go in drawers, vacuum (even though I have to do it again, they still love it), and with my help they clean their bathroom with natural cleaners. I hope this is helpful!!

  • http://homepages.baylor.edu/angela_funai/ Ang

    Our 9- and 11-year-olds take turns with unloading/loading the dishwasher and taking out the trash. They are on weekly rotations, so they know what their job is all week long. I still take the bag out of the kitchen trashcan occasionally, but they take it outside. Same with the dishwasher – I still do it about half the time, but they get plenty of experience. ;)

    Our 7-year-old and two almost-6-year-olds have morning pet duty (same deal with the weekly rotation). One waters the dogs, one feeds the dogs, and the other feeds/waters the cat.

    All of the kids have a laundry basket that we put their clean, folded clothes into, then they have to put them in their dressers or on their “daily shelves” (the cloth hanging cubby that goes in the closet with each day labeled … it’s great for planning the school week).

    The little three also take turns setting the table/passing out drinks, wiping off the table after dinner or sweeping under the table after dinner (again, three different jobs that rotate each week).

    I hope this helps! :)

  • Sheri

    my daughter just turned 9 and she does laundry (sheets, towels, rags – things that don’t matter as much, as she learns the washer and dryer), folds and puts away clothes, has dish duty (washing and dishwasher) with her 10yo brother, makes beds after linens are washed, cleans bedroom, sweep, mops, washes windows, vacuums, dusts, is learning to iron on scraps, cleans a bathroom, feeds animals, rakes leaves…..

    My 6 yo son folds and puts away laundry, has dish duty (drying and silverware) with older siblings, makes beds after linens are washed, clean bedroom, sweep, mops, washes windows, vacuums, dusts, feeds animals, rakes leaves

    As long as they are working alongside you, they are learning. It will also be easy to see how they do following instructions and when they are able to handle some tasks on their own. We have a large family and everyone has to pitch it – even the 2yo will grab her dusting cloth and work along side the rest of the family.

  • W Aiello

    At our house, the kids graduate into chores. As they get older their chores change and they take on different responsibilities. Current breakdown of duties: 12 yr old: feeds dog, unloads and loads dishwasher, wipes down children’s bathroom, keeps room clean and is responsibile fore keeping dining room in order. 9 year old: takes care of room, wipes down table after meals and sweeps under table when I’m busy. 7 year old: takes care of room, keeps shoes organized and he also works with the 9 year old to keep the living room tidy. 2 year old: well you know that’s a work in progress…:)

  • CC

    My daughter is 9. She and I entered into a “contract” for chores. She agreed to keep her tidy & bathroom picked up. She is responsible for clearing dinner dishes from the table (just placing plates/ forks in the sink). She also has a different chore for each day of the week. One day she wipes down the kitchen table, one day she sweeps the small entry way. One day she dusts with the feather duster in the dining room (just the outside of the china cabinet and window ledge), one days she windexes her bathroom mirrror. Just one small thing a day(for week days) and I don’t expect it to be perfect, just gives her some responsibility and the ability to earn an allowance (which we are teaching her to tithe from). I read Boudaries with Kids and it reminded it me we are not just raising children, but raising children to become adults. I want her to have some responsibility without overwhelming her. (Some of this may sound like a lot, but we have a very small home with small rooms..it’s really not a lot) You know your children and how much they are capable of. I think it all depends on the child. :)

  • julia

    my son will be 8 in december too and my younger son is 5. here’s what my 8 yr old’s daily jobs are…make bed, vacuum kitchen floor after each meal (we have a shark vacuum that sweeps hard floors as well as carpet and it is one of my 2 BEST cleaning tools ever…it replaces having to use a broom and is super easy for kids to use. nathan has been using it since he was probably 5 or 6), clear his own dishes from table and put them in dishwasher, wipe off counters/table after meal. he also makes and clean ups his own breakfast and lunch (simple things like cereal, sandwhiches, reheating leftovers, etc). weekly jobs: empty trash in house, shake out rugs, clean toilets, dust baseboards & blinds, and laundry from start to finish. ***this is a huge blessing to me and i’m telling you, my kids all started out LOVING that they could use the washer/dryer all by themselves. when they were just starting to use the washer/dryer, i marked w/a permanent marker the places where the dials needed to be set (now we have a digital set and they know which buttons to push).

    BEST TIME-SAVING TIP for any family…each of us does our own laundry and i never combine our clothes. it saves SO MUCH time b/c i(we) never have to sort clothes. my girls (age 11 and 12) and 8 yr old son each do 2 loads of laundry each week (one light, one dark). if the dryer happens to be full and i’m doing a load of my laundry i can immediately tell whose clothes are in there and i either call them to take them out or if i’m feeling nice i’ll take them out myself and put them on his/her bed. i started training my kids to do laundry when they were young. very young. when they were 3 they sorted their laundry (as soon as they took their clothing off) into one of 2 small laundry baskets in their closet. great color/sorting/matching skills here! i would have them help me put the clothes in the laundry and carry the baskets to/from the laundry. once the clothes were in their rooms, they sorted (again, great pre-school skills!) pants, undies, shirts, pajamama, socks, ect. this took them a while. sometimes i’d put a cd on for them to listen to. by the time they were 4+ they could put all their clothes away. by 5-6 they were completely on their own.

    my 5 yr old son has only been home w/us for a year (we adopted him from china at age 4) so he is way behind in what he does compared to our other kids. however, he does set the table, make his bed, and help the older kids w/their chores (he loves to help w/the toilets and shaking out the rugs the most).

    my 11 & 12 yr old daughters weekly jobs are laundry, mopping, dusting, load/empty the dishwasher, vacuuming & cleaning bathrooms. they also clean up the kitchen completely after dinner (and generally help me make the dinner too).

    i will add that we homeschool, so we have tons of time to practice these things.

  • Allyson

    Hi Angie! Chores are so much fun for kids to do! In our home, we want our kids to know just how important they are and how vital they are to making our family “run” and “work”. Chores really help show they how much we need them and are a great way to make them feel special! :) We have 4 little ones – 6, 5, 3, 2, and one on the way. We homeschool, like you do, and we also live on a homestead, so chores are an all-day sort of thing. Your kids can do SO much more than you probably think they can. Our 6 and 5 year old girls can help milk our cow. They can feed all of our other animals (goats, sheep, dogs, ducks, chickens) by themselves. They can do dishes, cook dinner (an easy dinner, of course), clean toilets, sinks, make up beds, etc. I don’t make them do all that at one time. :) Our 2 and 3 year old boys can pick up their toys, fill up feed buckets for the animals, go get the mail, etc. We do give a little allowance for chores (to our girls), but not always. We don’t want our kids working just for money, we want them to understand their vital role in our home and how it takes all of us working together to make it all “work”. If we only had a chores list or an established routine of chores that they got paid for, they would begin to expect payment for every job they do. However, it is beautiful because we get to watch them just jumping in and helping each other and Mom and Dad, on their own initiative, because they know how important it is to put others first and to serve and help others. All of this is trained and taught, of course, but it is so rewarding to all work together as a family to accomplish needed tasks. Jump in with the chores. Make it fun! Let your kids know how valuable they are and that your house just couldn’t run the same without them. :) Treat them with cookies or stickers or whatever they love from time to time when they DON’T expect it or haven’t asked for it. And just watch their faces glow. Be blessed today, and have fun smiling at and hugging your precious little ones. – Allyson :)

  • Gshintz

    So glad you were blessed by the conferences… will be praying for safe travel and peace for all your hearts as you are away:)

    As for chores, we have 5 living children 13, 11, 7, 5, 20 mos. (and sweet Samuel almost 2 years in Heaven)

    Right now in fact, my 13 year old Louis, is making breakfast waffles for all of us. He and our 11 year old, Caleb likes to cook basic things, grilled cheese, pancakes, noodles, mac and cheese, sandwiches, etc. That is a huge help and such a blessing to have a meal made. They take care of the animals, vacuum, clean the bathrooms, do dishes, can start the laundry etc…. One of the biggest helps from them is helping me fold all the laundry one night of the week. We stay of up later, watch a show and fold away:)
    7 year old Anna, helps with meals and cooking, helps with the bathroom, picks up, can fold clothes, helps with the dishwasher, and swifters the floors after they are dry vacuumed.

    5 year old, Elijah, helps with the bathrooms too, loves to unload the dishwasher, is a great little errand runner around the house, picks up toys, clothes, and helps with meals, etc.

    20 month old Hope, basically just helps to pick up… that is about it at this point.

    The best thing we do is firemans clean up after dinner. Just like in a firehouse, they all pick up the food, dishes, load the dishwasher, put away leftovers till the job is done. That way I am not stuck in the kitchen all night:) Love it! I try to give them tons of encouragement and to make them know how much I appreciate the help. With homeschooling, it is just a fact, that I can’t do it all, and need their help:) We talk a lot about being a team and that we all have to work together, of course they get lots of breaks too:)

    Hope this helps:)
    Sara

  • Anonymous

    My oldest (just recently turned 13!) has been washing his own clothes since he was 8 – that’s when I started doing mine. I had to help separate things out for a while but he got the hang of it. He also washes towels twice a week and takes the trash out on both trash days.

    With both boys (and the baby – now 6 mos – will do the same), they helped with picking up their toys/room from day one. Even now with the baby, I just say that it’s time to clean up and tell her what I’m doing as I’m doing it.

    We have a “helper chart” where the boys get a sticker (yes, even the 13 yr old) if they help do something without being asked. When they get x # of stickers (it differs w age), they get a “candy treat” – that’s what the 2 yr old calls it.

  • Lyndsay

    Everyday my 5 1/2 year old daughter has to make her bed and set the table for dinner. At least once a week she has to clean up her room and help mom or dad empty the garbage cans around the house.

  • Teresa

    My kids are 8, 5 and 3. The 8 yr old and 3 yr old and girls and share a room. They are responsible for cleaning their room to my expectation and are able to do it. My son is the 5 yr old and has his own room and is responsible to clean his own room and does. All three children are responsible to clean up after themselves if they pull out an activity or toy, if the toy or craft is not put away and another sibling does it for them they have to pay the sibling for doing it.

  • nikki

    Hi Angie! My son is 4 1/2, and he loves to help feed our dog, swiffer, pick-up his toys, and help set/clear the dinner table. I try to make it fun for him and give him lots of praise and encouragement. He also helps clean his room. We have a motto that we all work together as a family side-by-side.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_ESIO5KVZSFL5SF7BD7YTJZX74U Richard

    Hi Angie! By the time my kids were 10 years old, they were doing their own laundry. They each had a laundry bin (big Rubbermaid thing) that their dirty clothes went in, and they learned how to drag it to the washer, load the washer, put detergent in, turn it on, then load the dryer. So there was never any reason for them to say that they didn’t have any clean clothes (but they did anyway)

    They (all 3 of them) should be able to help unload the dishwasher – they can stack the dishes & let a grownup put them away; they can pick up the floor; they can even help mop the floor! Put athletic socks on them, put down some soapy water, & let them skate!

    They can be responsible for feeding/watering the dog (water the dog just before mopping the floor, not after), they can help vacuum; they can dust; they can clean door jambs & switch plates (with a dampened microfiber cloth).

    They can even help fix dinner – washing lettuce, tearing it for salad, kneading bread (if you’re an earth mother), and set the table. Make it a game & they’ll be begging to help!

  • http://homeschoolblogger.com/masonmoments Amy Mason

    So glad you were able to be at True Woman! I went in ’08 and so wanted to go this year but it didn’t work out. What an amazing conference! God has certainly used Nancy Leigh DeMoss in so many lives!

    I am not usually away from my children that long either – except when I am in the hospital having a baby I guess. But it really is hard to be away from them as they are so much a part of me. I’ll be praying for you!

    I am really bad with chores for my children (6 ages 3 – 11), at least in being consistent. One thing I have found to help (when I keep at it) is the book “Managers of Their Chores” by the Maxwells http://www.titus2.com. There are so many ideas on what children can do at what ages and it helps you organize it for each child. They even have an online system where you are able to print out little cards for each chore.

    I do find that children can do more than we think they are capable of, even the littlest ones. Our house would be more chaotic than it is if we didn’t all work together.

    Have an amazing time at Relevant! Phil 4:13 “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”

    ~Amy

  • Kelly

    We actually have a responsibilities chart in our home. Each of our three girls have things they are responsible for that make our family run better. I never call them chores because, while they technically are chores, if they don’t get done the responsibility of doing it gets put on someone else. Hence their responsibilities.

    We have an 11 year old and 9 year old who are my step-daughters and we have them every other weekend. They have to clean up their room (it’s the pre-teen fashion runway most days!), make their beds, bus their dishes and we always throw in something silly too. Last weekend they had to also tell a joke at dinner each night.

    I know some of these may seem really common sense, but they aren’t for our girls. We can add more as we find these things are working. They also take out the trash, help fold laundry, wipe down bathroom counters and unload the dishwasher.

    I also have a three-year old. Her main responsibilities are to pick up her toys, help me sort clothes, and put them away, put her dishes on the counter in the kitchen and help dust. They seem to be working great for her too.

    The National Center for Biblical Parenting has some great ideas around this. Their website might be a good place to check out.

  • Kelly

    We had 3 girls in our family, too! Saturday was “chore day” in our house (during the week we did the usual cleaning up our rooms/toys/messes and making our beds). My mom picked 3 tasks and gave us each one of them to do all by ourselves. We could: vaccuum, use pledge and dust all the wood in the house, scrub the bathtub/toilet/sink, pick up sticks in the backyard so our dad could mow the lawn, or sweep. Mopping gets a little too messy for an 8 year old, and requires some surprising muscle work to squeeze out and make sure you get all the water up!!

    We didn’t get any extra “allowance” for doing chores, either… This was just how mom expected us to help her around the house, and make our home nice! (We did get allowance for keeping our rooms cleaned and all that though…but not much, maybe a dollar/week.)

  • Sharalyns

    My 9 year old unloads the dishwasher, runs it when full, vacuums, cleans toilets, washes windows (his favorite), helps with laundry, sweeps (well, attempts to), and dusts. He is responsible every day to make his bed, pick up any clutter in the house (we have inspection at 3 p.m. -my hubby is OCD), feed the cats, put any dirty clothes in hampers, and put his clean clothes away (my rule since he was 3 is: I will wash, dry, and fold any clothes that are in the hampers, each person is responsible to put their clean ones away. We painted his drawer fronts with chalkboard paint and wrote the name of the clothing that goes there and drew a picture too.). Also, any mess he makes is his responsibility to clean up. If he doesn’t know how, I help teach him.

  • Josiegaskins

    Angie,

    I always enjoy reading your post! What a blessing you & your family are to many! I don’t have children, but was a child not long ago…oh how time flies! Anyways I can remember @ the time I HATED chores, but today as and adult I’m thankful my parents made me! So no matter what you ask them today they may not do it perfect or willingly, but I promise you when they get older they will thank you :) Lord Bless, Josie

  • Katie L

    I’m a nanny and the younger of the kids I watch is 8. He has been expected since he was 4 to help with household chores. Now, he vacuums, cleans the toilets/bathroom, washes windows, picks up dog poo outside, pulls weeds, feed the dog 1 time a day, take dishes to sink…they’re not supposed to do the dishes but they’re boys and maybe that’s why?? or more likely do to the fact they can’t reach the cupboards where many of the dishes go. They also have to keep their rooms clean and the basement. That’s all I can think of at the moment.

  • http://babygutierrez.blogspot.com sarahg3

    I firmly believe in giving kids responsibility at a young age. My 3 year old son helps with all sorts of stuff. (he doesn’t do the best job in the world, but it’s about training him rather than actually getting the work done well.) He feeds the pets, picks up his toys, puts his dirty clothes in the hamper, helps me hang laundry on the line (yes, we’re country folk!!), helps pull weeds and rake leaves, rinse (non-breakable) dishes, vacuum (he has his own small sweeper), and dust (I give him baby wipes to dust baseboards and stuff). I use it as an opportunity to teach him what the Bible says about hard work. We’ve been giving him chores practically since he could walk, and now that he’s getting a little older I’m finding that he enjoys helping me. I want to raise a young man who will be willing to help his wife when he’s married!!!

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_N66ZTZ3VU43ILPF7CGZYW3JALA Traci L

    I love that you said you are pretty sure you got snot on your air-plane buddy, hilarious.

    I’m having Mommy-Guilt for leaving my kids for Relevant, but I know it is going to be SO AMAZING. Praying for you! You will do awesome as you lean solely on the Lord :-) He will be your strength.

    I LOVE NANCY! Liz looks like a DOLL and a precious woman of God!

    For my daughter, Riley… I just had her “help” me out from a very young age- 15 months. I’d have her put clothes into the dryer with me, wash dishes…. etc.

    I know what you are thinking! haha It is NOT help at that age… but it teaches and trains them. Now she thinks it is fun to fold clothes at the age of 4.

    I don’t have any type of schedule yet though so I look forward to reading other people’s suggestions.

    Love, Traci @ Ordinary Inspirations (http://www.ordinaryinspirations.blogspot.com)

  • Shawna

    I think I missed something about the Zecheriah reference; I have missed lots of posts and just pop by from time to time when I’m able. So I’m out of the loop. :)

    I will look into the book you mentioned; I love bawling my eyes out and getting snot all over people…well, not literally. But you know what I mean.

    I am so bad about not getting my girls to do enough chores. I think having them fold and put away their own clothes is a good idea. I try to keep them away from the sink, though. They get water everywhere and just play in it. So keeping their rooms clean, making their beds, and doing laundry are good kid chores, with varying degrees of help depending on their ages.

    shawna-mygirls.blogspot.com
    iamthat-shawna.blogspot.com

  • Andrea

    My kids are 9 and 13, and are… BOYS! (So you can imagine that their “chores” aren’t exactly how I would do things at times.)

    They are responsible for their own bedrooms. If they make a mess, they clean it up – and my 9 year old has yet to figure out that life would be so much easier if you’d put your stuff up right after you play with it BEFORE you get something out… but as I digress…

    They are also in charge of their bathroom, however, I always have to intervene, as it ends up far below my standards. *shudder!*

    As far as the rest of the house, they take care of the pets, including the “poop scoop” of the yard before their dad mows on weekends. They take out the trash and do the laundry (wash and dry). I fold and then everyone puts up their own stuff.

    They also rinse dishes to put in the dishwasher, wipe counters, sweep, vacuum, dust, etc. Of course, they don’t do ALL these things ALL the time, they are just possibilities.

    Most of the time I’m lucky if they do any of it!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=612767383 Trista Morgan Evans

    My kids are 7 and 9…and here is a list of things I expect from them.

    -able to pick up their rooms. I just made sure that there was a place for everything and its not too complicated so they don’t get bogged down by organizing. (daily)

    -Help with their laundry. They can sort by color with my help. My son, the oldest has been taught how to start the washer and the dryer. He just asks me for water level/temp instructions. (I think having to remember what needs what setting is a bit much) He loads the washer, soap and starts it. He also transfers the clothes from washer to dryer then starts dryer. My daughter removes the clothes from the dryer so that I can fold them. They both put their own clothes away….(not always perfectly…but still). (weekly)

    -Dogs. Son feeds/waters in the morning. Daughter at night. (daily)

    -Son Vacuums, Daughter Dusts. (weekly)

    -Their own bathroom…Son Cleans the toilet. Daughter cleans the sink and empties the trash. (weekly with supervision)

    I have a rule…what is left down stairs after they go to bed is MINE. They are responsible for getting their things to their rooms. Items left out are not returned until the 30th of the month which is REWARD day! (daily)

    Reward Day: The children each get $20.00 for their month of chores…$5 goes into their savings. $5 goes to the church and $10 is theirs to do with as they please. Items left out can be purchased back at .25 cents per item. Items not wanted/needed are donated.

    Thats how we do it…was hard to stick too at first but now the kids look forward to it and usually do a pretty good job with minimal nagging from mom! I just remind that we are a family…and in a family everyone helps out!!

    • Nicole Rodriguez

      Love this! Such a wonderful idea with Reward Day!!! I am starting this with my boys!!!! Thank you :)

  • MJ

    -the three girls should be able to load and unload the dishwasher, even if the clean things get stacked on the counter, I take the sharp knives out of the cutlery tray but the rest is there’s
    -help load washer and dryer, and unload the dryer and fold things like towels and match socks, the 8 yr olds could probably do the whole laundry deal (and should)
    -vaccum
    -put things like books, games and toys back where they belong (after every use)
    -water indoor plants
    -dust surfaces
    -feed pets

    It all sounds pretty mundane, but through “chores” the children feel a sense of worth, that they
    have value to the family. No, things won’t be perfect, no it won’t mean less work for you, but you will be showing your trust in them and giving them the opportunity to contribute. I could go on with chores, but I’m betting if I read the other posts that everything imaginable has been covered.

    And, in case you were wondering, we don’t give allowance for this….we are a family, not a hotel, and everyone needs to help out to make it work, I tell them: “I don’t charge for the services I provide and I don’t expect to pay for the ones you do, we can talk about it if you are interested in paying me first :)

  • Nicole Rodriguez

    My oldest son is 11 and his everyday, no questions asked chores are taking out the kitchen and all bathrooms trash and filling ice trays. We’re old school – don’t have an ice maker. He also helps me clean the bathroom – he’s great at cleaning a toilet! And he will vacuum and sweep the floors when asked. Oh, and cut the grass :) My middle son is 3 and he cleans up all of his and my 11 mos old toys each night before bed time. Good times! I love the help!

  • That70zgirl

    I seem to have a different view than most people on this post, but that’s ok – I’m used to it. I did not have children so they could take over housework for me. I have 2 daughters 15 and 10. Each night they pick up downstairs (10 mins max) as it is usually all their stuff. They are responsible for their rooms (I change the beds). Once a week they share cleaning their bathroom…that’s it….I’m a SAHM and love taking care of my family. I don’t see laundry or cleaning the kitchen as a chore – I see it as a time to be thankful that I have a wonderful husbsnd and children to take care of. There are many times they will see things that need to be done and do them without me asking. They are both busy with school and activities and this is the only time in life when they won’t have huge responsibilites so on their free time I don’t make them do the mundane housework – I let them be kids. They are both good girls who don’t wait for me to give them chores and they don’t get paid for what they are asked to do around here. Many times after dinner they get up and load the dishwasher (or unload it) or see stacks of clean clothes sitting and put them away. This is the way I was raised and I look back with happiness that my parents gave me the opportunity to just be a kid. This is just my opinion and in no way do I believe everyone should feel this way – it’s just what works for me and makes my house a happy place to be.

    • Anonymous

      I wrote the same exact comment earlier this morning. I am glad there is more than just me who has this belief.

  • http://www.heaven-boundsinner.blogspot.com Erica Hami

    I took pictures of everything in my kids room when it was all clean and turned the pictures into labels. My kids know where things go and are responsible for keeping things were they go. We have a one toy/activity at a time rule that we stick to for the most part. Nothing new can be gotten out if the previous mess isn’t cleaned up first. They are also at the ages of 5 and 4 able to unload the dishwasher (things to high get put on the counter for me), unload the washing machine, help hang up laundry, help re-load and start the washing machine, hold the dustpan when I sweep, and help set/clear the table, and empty small wastebaskets. They help with these things on a daily basis and are considered their chores. They also both have an indoor plant that is ‘theirs’ and they keep on their desks that they water on a daily basis. One daughter has a fish that she has to feed and clean its bowl on a weekly basis. This was her choice to get the fish with her birthday money knowing the ‘work’ that would come with it. If I need help with something they are expected to come and help out however I need it, just as Mom helps them when they need it.

  • Brittany

    My daughter will be 8 in December also. She has a list of chores she’s required to do every day/week. She has to set the table every night, put away her folded laundry, dust, and keep her room tidy. She gets allowance twice a month and puts part of it in a savings account. I agree with the lady who said she didn’t have kids so she could avoid housework (I too am a SAHM), but I feel the kids also need to learn some responsibility. So far (we’ve been doing this for 4 months), she still loves to do her chores and help with anything else we ask her to.

    Good luck!

  • Jennifer W.

    My oldest son is almost 7 years old and he helps with emptying the dishwasher, clearing the table, taking out the recycling, and helping collect garbage. I also have a 3 1/2 year old, and he helps with collecting garbage as well. They both have to keep their room tidy and clean the playroom as well.

  • Heather O’Dell

    Hi, there’s a great book that I read last year by Jill Rigbsy: Raising Unselfish Children in a Self-Absorbed World that lists chores appropriate for children of all ages beginning with toddler all the way up through age 18, I believe. It’s a great resource! Good luck!

  • Jdaniel4smom

    I hope you have a great time at the conference. I had a hard time when I left JDaniel to go to the Type A conference. At two JDaniel help unload the unbreakable things from the dishwasher and helps with dusting.

  • Phebbs

    My kiddos are 3 and 4. They’re responsible for keeping their rooms clean. I also have them put their folded clean clothes away in their dressers. After dinner, I have them put their dishes in the sink and sometimes they even wash them off for me. They love to help unload the dishwasher. I’m even teaching my daughter (4) to sort laundry into piles. She’ll sit in the floor with me and I’ll ask her which pile something goes in. She also likes to help clean the glass on the coffee and end tables and help with dusting. They both enjoy trying to sweep the floors, so I just let them, then come behind them and re-sweep. :)

  • http://priority1mail.blogspot.com Catherine

    Hi Angie :)
    My almost 5 year old puts the clean silverware in the drawer, gives the dog food and water (most days when I remember to ask her to do this!), “dusts” the furniture with baby wipes, and picks up her toys off the floor. That’s about it! I’m curious to see what other kiddos do too.

  • http://ohpicklesmommy.blogspot.com Abivens2

    Angie
    I have been a follower from the beginning, my son was actually born April 4 2008 so I walked with you through this and prayed for you the whole time. Your words ans Audrey’s story has made me a better person and mom. In fact my name is Caroline and I love sharing it with Audrey.

    Anyway I have a life group with some teenage girls from the youth group and tonight I am sharing Audrey’s story. I am so excited to talk about it and I know it will move some of these girls. This is a story that will forever be in my heart and I wanted to thank you for shoring it will all of us.

    I hope your doing well. I want to see more pictures of sweet Charlotte. My daughter just turned three months so they aren’t too far off in age. To bad we are all the way in Kansas!

    Thank you!

  • Eaprayingmom

    Angie, I love to read you blog. My son who is 7 almost 8 we make him clean his room everyday, take out the trash, and vacuum the living room. All 3 of my kids the other 2 are 5 and 3 they all put their dishes in the sink and put away their clean laundry, sometimes i have them fold it to. Erin

  • BethB

    I’ve just started teaching my almost 5 year old how to take a Lysol wipe and clean her bathroom counter and toilet. I also have one of those scrubbing bubbles toilet wands that she’s pretty good at using. I’m still supervising, but she absolutely loves to do all this! She actually asked me the other day if she could clean her bathroom! Ha!

  • http://runningamuck.wordpress.com Runningamuck

    I can let you know what we do currently at my house. For daily chores, my 9 year old (girl) wipes down the bathroom sinks and counter tops with clorox wipes. My 7 year old (boy) wipes down the toilets with clorox wipes (that includes the area behind lid, the lid, the top/bottom of the seat and the rim under the seat), my 5 year old clears the table of the cereal boxes after b’fast and then wipes down the table with, you guessed it – clorox wipes. If the chairs are messy I have him wipe those off too. I do allow him to just sweep the crumbs onto the floor because I have to sweep anyway. My just-turned-four year old feeds the dog. I also have a list of chores that anyone can do for pay (since we don’t do “allowance”). The older two are the only ones who have done any of those. But the For-Pay-Chores include dusting certain rooms, vaccuming a living or family room, cleaning the sliding glass door (inside and out) and sweeping the diningroom. All of these chores come with a 25 cent or 50 cent payment. I love it when they want to make money because my house gets cleaned for just a few dollars!

  • Davidandkristen

    My 6-year-old collects the garbage bags from around the house, dusts, empties the dishwasher, collects laundry, folds laundry (kind of), and wipes the bathroom counters.

    That is, when she is motivated to buy another Barbie or something equally necessary. Ahem.

    We use a chore chart that was modified a bit from that used by the “Cheapest Family in America” – the book is on Amazon (and elsewhere, I’m sure!).

  • http://www.calebsministry.com Melodie

    Waaaait!!! Back the truck up… What is significant about Zechariah???!!! What am I missing?!

    • guest

      It’s just a little hard to find — that’s all. :o )

  • Monica

    I have a five and a half year-old, four year old, three year old and a 9 month old. The only one who doesn’t do chores is the baby. ;) The oldest is in charge of their bathroom. He wipes down the counters, potty, mirrors, floor in front of the potty (b/c two little boys will do that) and takes out the trash. The four year old helps with laundry and the three year old helps empty the dishwasher, set the table, put out cups, etc. All of the them are expected to make their beds, put their dirty clothes away, put their clean laundry away, clear their spot at the table and clean up their toys.

    Looooove your blog. HTH you a little bit. Chores are a necessity here with so many little people and only one mama.

    Monica

  • http://planetnomad.wordpress.com/ edj

    When my kids were that age, we lived overseas w/o a dishwasher. They started washing/drying dishes at about 8, and sweeping the floor, and setting the table. Now, they can clean a kitchen nearly as well as a grown woman–certainly as well as a man ;) (they’re 13 and 15 now) They’re still shaky on cleaning their rooms though. Chores also include taking out the garbage and other things I ask them to do if I need help. I think nearly-8s can take out the garbage.

  • http://www.lovinmuch.blogspot.com alison

    Oh, I am so glad you asked this!! I have been debating the same thing lately. My kids are 7, 5 and 3 and I know there are some age-appropriate chores for them. I have never been consistent with chores or allowance for them, and I want to start! Excited to read some suggestions!

  • Jennjennortiz

    Good question. With my daughters homework I sometimes feel guilty even asking her to do chores. Then I go to my cousins house, and I watch, and marvel at her children. They clean the dishes every night, and not just that. They clear the table, put all the food up, do the dishes, counters, and sweep the floor. They move like butterflies they are so graceful. I am thinking of sending my daughter there for boot camp!

  • Melissa

    Simple chores are best. I don’t want having my kids do chores to ultimately be a chore for me. SO…two or three a day per child seems best. Things like…making their beds and keeping their rooms clean. Using wipes to wipe the bathroom counters. Emptying trash cans into the bigger trash can and even carrying it to the garage or outside can. Using Windex on the storm door or appliances. Running the vacuum just in the Family Room where we have an area rug. Emptying the dishwasher…mainly silverware at the younger ages. Putting away their clean laundry. These are things I have my younger boys do and they really are helpful to me! And mostly, they own their chores and enjoy doing them. MOSTLY. :) Good seeing you at the conference! Melissa from FamilyLife!

  • Missy

    Our 9 and 7 year old boys empty and refill the dishwasher. Both also take out the garbage and recyclables. They are also responsible for folding their own laundry and making their own bed on the day their bedding gets washed.

    The girls, ages (just turned) 3 and (almost) 5 help fold towels/washcloths and also help with folding their laundry. They also enjoy helping with wiping down counters/tables and unloading the dishwasher.

    All 4 kids fight over who gets to vacuum. Even the 3 year old! The 3 and 5 year olds especially love to vacuum and practically beg to do it.

    All 4 also put their dirty dishes in the sink, rinsing them off first. They can all help set the table as well. They also help with feeding/watering the dog and cat, and the 7 year old usually helps with the kitty litter box.

    Everyone is responsible for keeping their own room clean and helping pick up the general play area toys.

  • Rachel

    Focus on the Family put out a list of age-appropriate chores on their website. Hope it helps.

  • Caroline

    Hi there, we have a ‘Contributions chart’ with ‘How i contribute to our family…’ at the top with a range of activities like ‘made my bed’, ‘helped with a laundry run’, ‘initiative helping’, ‘helped with preparing dinner’ ‘set or clear the table after meals’ etc. Mon-Sat satisfying tick boxes help them see how they serve and they are beginning to see for themselves how it benefits the whole family and we see their hearts grow in giving. Little chores are an opportunity for them to Love the ones closest to them which will help bless them and others later in life too i believe. They are blessed in giving. Our children are 13 and 9, and they enjoy cooking and making cups of tea especially. These are some blessings we have and will highlight here for them :) Thanks Angie for sharing your life ! Shine on . x

  • Connie L Amato-Mahle

    Dearest Angie,

    May God be with you this especially weekend as you make your travels safely.

    May the Holy Spirit guide your thoughts and words, allowing you to minister to others’ hearts.
    - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - –
    My husband and I have two young daughters, 4 years and 9 months. We have a rather simple philosophy: encourage responsibility in the smallest of matters. The rest of the bigger things will come.
    - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - –
    The very best of wishes on your journey, my friend!

    In love and friendship,
    Connie Amato-Mahle
    Clarion, PA

  • Nancy

    Chores are a great thing. I think this is maybe the one area where modeling something for your child does not produce the behavior modeled. If you constantly serve them, and don’t encourage them and give practical ways to serve then you often end up with young adults who expect to be served… I’ve seen it all around me. My children are 18 and 23 (our daughter has special needs) and they are both at home and quite actively involved in the upkeep of our home. My 18 year old son has become an amazing cook…I think he might even surpass his mama! Ask your girls what are the things they would really enjoy doing and get them going on that. If they are doing something they enjoy they are more likely to do it well and semi-cheerfully! And like my son, who I encouraged to cook creatively whenever he wanted to, they may become amazing cooks, decorators, designers, and cleaners. Have fun!

  • http://www.withgreatjoy.blogspot.com Stacy

    Angie~

    My oldest daughter is 8, and this year I taught her to do the laundry! So~ she is responsible for gathering the clothes, sorting them into darks/lights, loading the washing machine and the dryer. (We *all* do the folding and putting away, though!) She also takes care of our little flock of backyard chickens (feeds them and gets them water, lets them out in the mornings), and she tidies the living room, too, right now.

    Other things she has done (in other seasons), and I think any of these could be applicable for a five-year old, too:
    *tidy kitchen
    *unload dishwasher
    *clear the table off
    *sweep kitchen floor
    *organizing different places around the house (extra, but she *loves* organizing)
    *helping a littler sibling (reading, taking him/her along with her while she works)
    *tidy other (smaller) areas of the house: (my five-year-old often tidies the shoes by the front door)
    *fold and put away her own laundry

    (Oh, and I can relate to the inability to find certain books in the Bible. Sheesh! A few weeks ago I forget what-tiny-book-we-were-supposed-to-turn-to, but I could NOT find it. I leaned over to my six-year-old and asked him if he could please help mama out. :) )

    Blessings to you and yours!
    …Stacy

  • Sherri

    I have five children ages 11, 9, 7, 5, and 4.

    My 11 year old son can cook, bake, clean, and do laundry like nobody’s business. If something happened to me, he could fill my shoes in a heartbeat.

    My 9 year old is an aspiring chef, and she can do all of the above, too, but her specialty is the “finishing touches”. She can make any room look pretty. I’m convinced it’s a gift. One she did not get from me. =-)

    My 7 year old son makes oatmeal for breakfast everyday, and his jobs are wiping off the table and sweeping the floor.

    My five year old takes out the trash, loads and unloads the dishwasher, and helps the older two with cleaning windows and floors.

    My four year old is my right hand man. Whatever I’m doing, he’s helping with so that he will be able to do all of the above in a year or so, too. All this is in addition to keeping their rooms clean everyday (they can’t leave their rooms in the morning until they are clean) and doing their schoolwork.

    I keep it simple and they know it’s a way of life. I think the key is consistency in rewards and consequences, and setting a good example. Hope that helps!

  • julie1916

    I have a 13 year old, 6 year old and 1 year old. One year old does nothing but make messes. My 6 year old cleans the litter box, the bathroom and her room. I wash her clothes and put them away because all of her shirts get hung up and she can’t reach them by herself. My 13 year old does just about everything I do except for sweeping and mopping the house. If they work together, they do the dishes and so forth. They have no specific chores each day aside from keeping their room clean and feeding the animals. That being said, if I ask them to do it, it is expected they will do it. Now, if my 6 year old cleans the bathroom, I go in there fulling knowing it will not be cleaned to my standards. If it appears she has made a good effort and has tried to clean the bathroom, I thank her and send her on her way. If not, I will remind her of the things that still need to be done and let her finish.

  • Lhordyk

    My almost 4 year old has a chore chart. He has to do things like make his bed, get dressed (the biggest struggle every day), feed the dog, pick up his toys and say his memory work. At the end of the week he gets a hot wheels truck if he has enough stickers on his chart. I see that other people are far more ambitious in what their kids do, but we are just starting with it, and I am 8 months pregnant, so I don’t have the energy for much else.

    On another note, I cry and break out in sweats at the thought of leaving my kids. We did it once for a long weekend, and I cried when we left. They were with a doctor, we knew they were safe, and they apparently didn’t miss me much.

  • Anonymous

    My newly 9 year old daughter can: Do her own laundry, empty the dishwasher (can’t load it worth a darn), make pancakes, make her bed, take care of her cat, vacuum her room, clean a bathroom top to bottom, and sweep and mop the kitchen. She doesn’t do all of those things all of the time, but she has been trained to do them all. With a checklist for the bigger chores, she is self-sufficient.

    My 6 year old son can: Separate laundry into colors and put his folded laundry away, plus transfer laundry from the washer to the dryer; clean his room, make his bed, sweep the kitchen and the driveway, clean up after the dog, and empty most of the dishwasher (all our plates and glasses are down low, but he can’t reach the special stuff).

    I give each child (including my 4 year old) 2 or 3 major chores to do each day plus daily stuff.

    Train them well, give them the proper tools including what loads are washed on what cycle, and set high expectation, yet use failures as teaching moments, not discipline times, and I believe we will train great homemakers!

  • Coby

    My 3 1/2 year old twins have a few simple chores – we have a chore chart that I got from Jolanthe over at Homeschool Creations – she has one with pictures for non-readers, and I love it! Anyhoo, their chores are to feed the dog, set the table (to the best of their ability), brush their teeth, and clean up toys at the end of the day. I laminated it and stuck magnets on the back of the pictures and put the whole thing on the fridge so that, when they’ve completed a chore, they remove the picture and put it in a little dish on the counter, that way they can see what they’ve accomplished and still needs doing.

    Praying for you as you’re away from your sweet girls!

  • Anonymous

    This isn’t really related to your current post, but thought I’d share that I’m about to have a baby girl ANY day now and I think her name choice may have been somewhat unconsciously based on reading your blog beforehand. We’re naming her Audrey and though it may not have been directly as a result of your Audrey, I won’t be able to not think about your Audrey sometimes when looking at our little girl. I know your Audrey lives on in many ways and I’d like to think this is another little way she will live on… not to mention I love the name and could not think of any other name for our daughter :)

  • Guest

    My 9yr. old empties trash cans around the house, takes it to the curb and brings it back, cleans toilets with some supervision, picks up his room, and i’ve occasionally made him mop the kitchen floor or vacuum. Oh and I’ve had him wash the dishes many times, as well as empty the dishwasher. But it’s hard to get him to do all these things LOL.

    I basically just have my 5yr. old pick up his toys from wherever they are in the house, put everyone’s shoes way nicely in the shoe rack and that’s about it. He is much more willing though to help so can’t wait until he’s older and can do more! ;)

  • Speedturtle76

    My 3 year old sets the table, helps to put things in the fridge, puts her clothes in the laundry basket, and cleans up her toys. At age 8, my Mom expected me to sort my own laundry, take out trash, clean my room, set the table, and wash dishes. We did a lot. My expectations for my 3 year old are not consistent. She is always asked to put her dirty clothes in the laundry basket but she sets the table about 3 times a week. It is a young age. My parents used to ask my sister and I to sign up for chores for the week. So we picked 2 to 3 things that we were responsible for and I guess it gave us more of a feeling of empowerment to pick what we were going to do.

    On a side note, could you say a little prayer for my little peanut. I will be 36 weeks with my second baby (but 4th pregnancy). Although I suspect everything is okay, I haven’t been able to gain much weight since 5 months and my fundal height is measuring 5 weeks behind, and my Midwife thinks I may have low amniotic fluid. So I will have an ultrasound in the next week to determine if this little peanut is okay. It is our hope to deliver her in a free standing birthcenter. We will not get to do this if she is small or if there is a problem. Of course our prayer is that she is perfectly healthy and just petite like her sister.

  • Anonymous

    I have a 2 year old, a 4 year old, and a 6 year old, and also 3 year old and 4 year old stepsons who I have part time.

    I feel the same way you do :o (

    I feel like it’s so much of a fight to get them to do anything that I would rather just do it myself most of the time. But then I think that they’re not learning what it is to be responsible.

    *sigh*

    When I was about 7, I started doing a huge amount of chores. I vacuumed, washed dishes, swept, folded and put away laundry, scrubbed bathrooms…

    At the ages my kids are now… what I would *like* to be able to expect of them…

    At a few months shy of 3, I would like to be able to expect my daughter to pick up toys and put them in the toybox, to put dirty laundry in the hamper, maybe to put the silverware away. Easy, straightforward things.

    At 4 years old, I would like to be able to expect my daughter to start putting her own laundry away and do a good job of cleaning her room. At 4, she should be able to clear the table after meals. In addition to the things I wish I could get my 2 year old to do.

    At 6 years old, I would love to be able to expect my son to start helping with the dishes, to run the vacuum, to sweep the hard floors, to empty the smaller trash cans from bedrooms and bathrooms, in addition to what I wish my girls would do.

    It doesn’t seem like that should be too much to expect.

    But it’s like pulling teeth.

    And I feel like in order to get them to help, I have to stand over them, yelling and threatening and bribing, and in the end, most of the time it’s just easier to do it myself.

    *sigh*

    On another note, I would love to see some new pictures of that beautiful family of yours! I’ve been following your blog for quite some time, and when you said the girls were 8, I couldn’t believe it!! I know you’re busy, though :o )

    ((((((hugs))))) to you all.

  • http://www.tswoodford.blogspot.com Steph

    Dear Angie,
    I enjoy reading your blog, and appreciate many things you write about! Thanks for being an encouragement! Our family also has 4 girls, ages 7.5, 4.5, 3 and 18 months. I was really interested in this post, and read all the comments before commenting myself! I was very impressed!! =) I have been helped immensely by the books “Managers of their Homes”, and “Managers of their Chores” by Steve and Teri Maxwell at http://www.titus2.com . We homeschool too, and I’m thankful for the little and some not so little things the girls help with so that our home runs smoother.

    I did not have regular chores as a child, and feel like I struggle more with this as a result. We also now live in Mexico, which means a much dirtier house more often. Our girls are generally good at doing their chores, but one in particular needs more supervision than the others.
    These are some of the things our girls do (some on a regular basis, some occasionally):
    7.5 yr old – make bed, put toothpaste on toothbrushes, set & clear table, wash and dry dishes (we don’t have a dishwasher), change laundry over, fold laundry, put clothes away, simple dusting, cleaning up toys, help with some food prep.
    4.5 yr old (my most easily distracted) – make bed, set & clear table, dry dishes (not knives), put own laundry away, clean up toys, organize shoe rack, wipe down walls.
    3 yr old – make bed (usually with some help), set table, put own laundry away, clean up toys.
    1.5 yr old – help clean up toys

    Probably one of the hardest things is to be consistant and patient in teaching them, and making sure they get done (otherwise there’s almost no point in doing it in the first place). The teaching takes time, and so does the checking, but very worthwhile. Our girls generally are happy to do their work, and are pleased at seeing their accomplishments. I try to encourage them what a blessing and help they are being by helping out the whole family in what they do.

    Thanks for posting – I sure many of the comments!
    Love in Him,
    Steph

  • Lizreeves2

    Angie,
    Go to my facebook page & look in my summer 2009 & summer 2010 albums. I have pics of my kids’ chore lists on there. Take a peek & you can see what my kiddos do around here.

  • Laurie

    Buy the book “What Every Child Should Know”. It has lists in the back for every age listing age appropriate chores. If you actually do it all (we didn’t) your kid will be 18 and a totally independent responsible adult. Laurie

  • Morgan Alexander

    Chores, my two sons (Lawson – 8 and Shelton – 3) have them. Lawson cleans his room and puts away laundry and helps Shelton pick up his room. He also helps with laundry (sorting, removing from the dryer), sets the table for meals and helps clear the table when meals are finished. Shelton helps with laundry (pushing the baskets around and loading/unloading the dryer), picks up his room, and helps with dusting, sweeping, and occasionaly vacuuming.

  • Dnkwilliams

    Chores can be a fun part of family life. My children have had chores since they were about 3. They are always “with help” until they can do things alone. Right now my 3 year old is responsible for shoes in the living room and milk jugs in the milk box for the milk man (we have our milk come from a dairy) She can do those alone now and her room is a group project right now. My 10 year old does his own laundry, and is in charge of the family room and his room. He is very good at these jobs. My 12 year old does her own laundry, cleans her bathroom, and room. Those are non paying because you live in our house chores. Then we have you can earn extra with anything else they help with. I of course will put their laundry in and help make their load lighter and they in turn will help me when I am busier than normal.

  • Imamann

    Someone once told me that chores help children to know that the family wouldn’t function the same if they weren’t in it. I like that idea. :) I have a two year old little girl who likes to help…but our expectations right now (that we help her with) are making her bed, picking up toys, putting her dirty laundry in the hamper, helping set the table, and put away her bibs/wash rags while I’m folding laundry. It’s not a battle yet becuase she loves helping with stuff. Hope that helps some.

    Andrea

  • Jdehaven2002

    I think it has to do with personality as much as age. . . . . my oldest wasn’t super motivated, where my second daughter is a real go-getter, so they’ve added responsibility at about the same pace, even though they are three years apart. Anyway, here goes.
    Karissa (5) helps fold laundry some, clears the table sometimes, picks up toys, etc. She makes her bed every day, picks up her room, and opens her blinds. That’s about it.
    Kristen (9.5) folds laundry and puts her own away, clears and wipes the table after meals, dusts and vacuums her room (and sometimes other rooms upstairs), keeps her room clean, makes her bed, and cleans her sink.
    Kaitlyn (12.5) babysits, can run a load of laundry, fold it, and puts her own away, loads and unloads dishwasher, keeps her room clean (ahem – working on this), dusts and vacuums her room (and sometimes other rooms upstairs), makes her bed (sort of), and cleans her sink. She’s my more messy child – but she really pitches in when I need her to.
    I’m sure I’m forgetting some things, but that’s the jist of it. By no means do they do all of these things every day, but some (like making the bed) they do.
    Overall, I’d say just start with one or two things, and as you train them how to do it, check on them – come along side them, then when they are ‘good’ at it, add something else. The hardest part is remember that your standards are probably harder than what they are capable of and to just be happy with a good effort. They’ll get better with time!
    On a side note – I’m so jealous you got to meet and SIT with Priscilla Shirer – our ladies Bible study did one of her studies last year. So good!
    Jen DeHaven

  • Malitha

    I have 4 girls, too. The oldest is my niece (13), and my daughters are 5, 3, and 1. About two months ago I made “Chore Charts” for them. We went to Michael’s and they each picked out their own scrapbooking paper that kind of resembled their personalities, and matching “fancy” stickers that I attached to thumbtacks. I printed out their list of chores and pasted them to the charts. Once they finish a particular task, they mark it with their sticker tack, and it gives them a sense of accomplishment. The chores they do vary based on their age. 13: Vacuum, unload dishwasher, own laundry, make bed and keep room clean. 5: Make bed, feed the pets, dust the banister. 3: Water the plants, help set the table, feed the pets. They’re all responsible for cleaning up after themselves when they play, too. :)
    Malitha

  • Cmcjmommy4

    Angie,

    Praying for safety and peace for you during Relevant! :)

    As for our schedules/chores…we’re all over the place a bit because of my kiddos’ ages. I have three girls, ages 13, 6, and 4, and one little 3 yr old boy. The oldest obviously does the lion’s share of it (and she’ll gladly tell you about it sans humility), and lately I have been relying on my 6yr old more and more to lighten the load of my oldest. My 2nd is very strong and independent, so she does jobs that might be above the norm…but she does them well. She helps clean the kitchen after meals, load and unload the dishwasher, takes folded clothes upstairs, and she can dust and clean mirrors/windows. My 4yr old loves to dust baseboards and wipe down furniture (dry dust). She can also carry up clothes to the closets/dressers and put them away, as well as help set the table and do some of the clean up after meals. I haven’t really given my son much to do yet, but he loves to sit on the counter next to the stove and stir and pour. :) He will take clothes upstairs, but I’ll find them on the floor unfolded and have to do it over again. lol

    It depends on the kids, too! Here’s a helpful website of a mom who has some neat ideas and even little notecards to tape on dresser drawers, etc. — chore cards as well for readers and “pre”-readers!! It’s www(dot)totalmom(dot)com.

    Blessings!
    Kelly in KS

  • Threelilarrows

    Ha Ha! You started doing the song…..I can totally relate!

    I’ll get back with you tomorrow on some ideas for chores. I have to go to bed now.

  • Jenn

    My 5 yo daughter doesn’t do “regular” chores. Probably b/c I don’t do “regular” housework! HA! The things that I do ask her to do when I’m cleaning include: putting away her clothes, picking up her toys and putting them where they belong, running the Swiffer Vacuum, putting dirty dishes in the sink (I’m a little anal about how my dishwasher gets loaded), making her bed, occassionally helping me fold clothes. My 3 yo son will help pick up & put away (I use that term very loosely!) toys, and with a little guidance put his clothes away. I kind of feel like we should do more structured things for chores and start teaching them about work ethic and earning, etc. But I’m about to have #3 and it makes me tired just thinking about implementing that!! :)

  • http://survivingmiscarriages.blogspot.com/ Jessica

    I’ll be praying for a worry free and safe trip for you! <3

  • Lara

    I have 9 year old twins and they help with the following:
    They put their dishes in the dishwasher after meals.
    They collect trash from the bathrooms.
    I have them bring their dirty laundry basket to the mudroom.
    I give it back to them with clean clothes and they put them away in their rooms.
    They feed and water our Golden Retriever, Murphy and our cat, Charlie.
    They fold some laundry.

    Love following your blog Angie!

  • http://www.vibrant-designs.blogspot.com Julie

    Think of it this way. Our children have to learn how to do it all…eventually. They may not get married and be the only one taking care of their home. So…it light of that, I don’t think there’s a too early for anything. My children (5,3,1…the 1 year old is not included yet) help unload the dishwasher, put toys away, dirty clothes to the laundry room, put dishes in the sink…these are the things that are actually semi helpful. They help with other things like cleaning the bathroom…but it’s more so, they’re scrubbing at the wall, while I scrub the tub. The main thing is that they’re in there with me, ‘learning’ how to clean. And frankly, this doesn’t happen all the time…mainly when I have the patience to deal with it! My son also takes trash out (5). SO, I would suggest have them helping with lots of things (when you can patiently deal with the HELPING). I think the earlier we start, the better they will be at housekeeping. Just my 2 cents. And boy I am soooo not perfect! Really, I’m actually pretty bad at housekeeping, but that’s why I’m doing things early with them. I want them to not struggle as much as I do with the housecleaning/keeping.

    Julie
    http://www.vibrant-designs.blogspot.com

  • Lynn Sanders

    Some of the chores we use or have used in the past:

    empty dishwasher (has caused a few broken dishes)

    bring laundry down (must be in baskets in individual room – they aren’t responsible for picking dirty underwear of the floor)

    collect trash from cans around the house, bring big cans to / from street on trash day

    fold clothes

    pack diaper bag – great on for younger kids – they just had to make sure the wipe container was full and there were 4 diapers in the bag – I changed out the extra outfit as needed.

    Clean out van – another good one for little ones

    Clean kitchen after dinner (I have older ones)

    Of course the usual – dust, vacuum, clean bathroom, clean bedroom

    They do not have all of these every day, but on a rotating basis

  • Renagunther

    I just love that I can read your blog & comment via my Droid while awaiting my husband’s back surgery.
    I can relate to questioning my lack of chore enforcement or overuse of same. My girls are 20, 17 & 4. While my oldest is married, she & her husband (currently deployed) & baby boy live with us. So that’s all new territory trying to maintain order in the home with two households. When she & my middle daughter were younger I made them fold & put away their own laundry. I’m talking elementary age. I did random drawer checks & would dump the clothes in a pile on their floors upon discovering messy drawer. A little over the top, no?
    Fast-forward to present day after tubal-reversal and now four-year-old. I struggle to maintain balance. Dynamics in the home have changed, the Lord has tempered me (all my girls shout, “AMEN!”) And I now make the two oldest keep up their rooms & bathroom (of course) and help on an as needed basis with the rest. The four-year-old helps with her room & picking up her baby nephew’s toys as well as unloading silverware from the dishwasher. It’s not hard labor but sometimes the strong willed little one announces, “I can’t take this,” & leaves the silverware behind.

  • Ginger

    My son 8yrs old has a “must” chore he does everyday like:
    Mon – strip bedding & bring clothes down for laundry
    Tues – vacuum upstairs & dust room and playroom
    Wed – clean bathroom (bathtub & toilet)
    Thurs – vacuum downstair formal living & dining
    Fri – mop kitchen

    And Rachel, my almost 5yr old has some too:
    Mon- strip her bedding & bring clothes down for laundry
    Tue- vacuum room & dust
    Wed- clean bathroom sink & mirror
    Thurs- vacuum downstairs office
    Fri- sweep kitchen

    They pretty much coincide with each other. And then they have things they do on a regular basis, like: rinse of dish & put them in dishwasher, my son automatically empties out trash if he sees it needs to be done, put away any toys left out before they go to bed…

    But I’ll admit, it’s hard sometimes not to go behind them and “re-do” it!! (and I’ll admit I’ve done that a few times) but the Lord has helped me in letting those things go and just be grateful. Looking forward to read how the Lord directs you!
    Will be praying for you this weekend ~ :-)

  • Mckennah

    my daughter (3 1/2) loves anything that involves a squirt bottle so i let her clean surfaces in our house. i use organic cleaner that is mostly water and give her a roll of paper towels and shes off. an entire roll of towels later and a refill on the bottle and most of counters and tables in our house are clean :)

    she also picks up toys and helps me with putting away the laundry.

  • Amynic98

    Ahhh!!! It was you. I saw you and thought it was you but was to shy to say hi. The conference was great for me.
    Amy

  • Kates_2003

    My almost five year old is responsible for keeping her room cleaned and picked up , for using the dust buster to sweep up under the dinner table, and to scrape her dinner plate and put it in the dishwasher. When I clean the bathroom she gets a lysol wipe and wipes down the cabinets, door handles, toilet handle, etc.

    HTH!

  • Sheilannpat

    It’s hard to keep the chores with the age group. The oldest, she is 10 now and Serena (8, will be 9 in Jan.) do the same chores. Probably not fair, but they have to clean their room (when I tell them), put their laundry away and set & clear the table at dinner time. They share a room. My 5 yr old, well, he’s a boy. He has to pick up him room when he is told (his 3 yr brother shares a bedroom with him), occassionaly I have him empty garbages and take out the recycle. Owen, my 3 yr baby, well he just looks too darn cute for me to make him do anything. But, of course, I make him help me pick up the shoes & clothes off the floor. Good luck~ In God’s Love, sheila

  • Sheilannpat

    This reminded me of the day I wanted to take the kids to the zoo, but the house had to get cleaned first, Everyone, even my husband, was working together. Serena (8 yr old) said she would do the bathroom. But, really, you do have to watch their personality types. You see, Serena tends to be a perfectionist and the bathroom had way to many possiblities and 45 minutes of working at it, she decided I could finish. She had taken everything off both counter tops and was sorting hair ties and lotion and organizing hair products & make up. Too many possiblities for her, at that rate, we would have never gotten to the zoo. hehehe

  • Shelly

    Focus on the Family has a section on their website that deals with age appropriate chores and what types of chores children can do based on their ages.

  • Jabross40

    Angie,
    At 8, I had my children help with their laundry. Mine were able to help seperate, fold and put away. The put away their own laundry, but other family members they simply placed on their beds. My girls also helped put away dishes. 5 year olds can dry and put away silverware, and plastic items. 8 year olds can do those plus pots and pans. You can help them understand about taking about the trash by purchasing small cans and putting a grocery sack into them. On trash day everyone can gather their little bags and bring them to the location for bigger bagging. I always gave my kids the idea that they were helping with the running of the house. I found that if I started to soon with the idea of “chores” instead of just “helping mommy” they got turned off pretty quick and things became a battle. I didn’t want to battle my kids soooo I just presented it differently. Once they were a little older and I would say don’t forget your chores… I had to explain what I meant…LOL they were shocked… they’d been doing “chores” for years and didn’t even know it!

  • Jenny

    Hi Ang..

    Hope this helps… My DS’s kindergarten sent home a “tip” list.. one of the things that hit me the most was that it said that anything he could reasonably do he should do. We had been doing so much for him because he is the only kid (for now) that it really made me think. So now he is responsible for picking up his toys, putting his dishes in the sink, and “helping” me clean – usually dusting with swiffer cloths. I try to think about everything from that perspective now.. if he can he should.

    Also, if I can ask for some prayers from the Sunday’s… we are 10 weeks pregnant.. we were expecting triplets but we found out Tuesday we lost one. Baby B is measuring a week behind Baby A and they are concerned. Please keep us in your prayers in this critical time.

  • Ashlie

    We keep a laminated list on our frig. I just made one up b/c something was always worded differently or too many/too few on the ones from the store. So, I just made up a list. If you have a laminator (which I do b/c i’m a homeschooler and LOVE office supplies–ha), just laminate it and you can use a dry erase marker on it. My kids (we have 4) all have laundry baskets w/ their names on them. I keep them in the laundry room, and fill them as the clothes come out of the dryer. They all put their clothes away once their baskets are full. They also put their own dirty clothes in the dirty basket, but of course i’m still always saying…”get your clothes off the floor” (did i say “say”….b/c i would never yell at them…gulp–ha). They also unload (all except the 4 year old) the dishwasher. One kid does it Mon/Wed….another one on Tues/Thurs. We usually run the dishwasher at night, so it’s ready to unload in the am after b’fast. One child unloads in the am. Each person in the family rinses and loads throughout the day if they use a dish ( after a meal/snack). One day a week, a child has to clean a bathroom. We also use safe, eco friendly cleaning supplies, so no worries about toxic fumes, etc. One day a week, a child gathers trash from the cans around the house (bedrooms/bathrooms). My husband or I do handle the big kitchen trash. Rooms must be picked up before bed time (or if we are having folks over, so there is a “clean slate” to mess up). I don’t mind toys and things out during the day b/c they are kids and should be playing and getting messy, but all should be in good order before bed. Again…clean slate for the next day. Now, if a set up has been worked on really hard and they want it out for a few days, that is fine, and we make exceptions for those occassions. Anyway…hope this helps. One really positive result of homeschooling is having the time to teach our kids to do chores. We have one child in school b/c of a learning disability, and it’s just harder to find the time for him to do chores. So, seize the opportunity while you can and while they are young! We all pitch in b/c that’s what it means to be part of a family…a wonderful gift!

  • Rachel

    Angie, I’m not a mom, but my mom was great about handling chores. My sister, my brother, and I always had chores expected from us. As previously mentioned by several posts, all of us had to have our rooms cleaned daily, and my mom’s goal was for us to have our beds made everyday. When my brother and I were younger (pre-teen years), she made a chart for laundry. She placed on the inside of the cabinet where the detergent and such is stored, and she broke it down into groups (i.e. reds, whites, darks, towels, etc). With each group, she posted what settings matched, etc.

    All this and more to say, I appreciate my mom (and dad) for establishing chores and expectations for their children. Now that I am living on my own, I automatically do those things, and I appreciate a neat and tidy home :) Good luck! You’ll make the very best decision.

  • http://www.revisedexpectations.wordpress.com Kriscello

    My kids are 8, 6, 3 and 11 months. The three older kids are expected to keep their rooms picked up and make their beds each morning before breakfast. The two oldest have a list of daily chores that they divide at the beginning of each week. (They alternate who chooses first each Monday, then they pick a chore from the list until all of them are selected.) These particular chores are “money chores”; they receive a small weekly allowance if all of the chores are completed during the week. Current money chores are: vacuuming downstairs, vacuuming the stairs, emptying trash cans, emptying the dishwasher, folding and putting away clean towels, sweeping the kitchen floor, wiping down the bathroom floors and dusting the window sills. Some of these are daily and some are once a week.

    ~K

  • http://emptymefillmeagain.blogspot.com/ The Mrs.

    We’re a homeschool family and as any homeschool family knows there’s a LOT going on, on any given day. Things run so much more smoothly when we can really work as a team each day. At the same time, when everyone pitches in, I feel my children are learning MANY valuable life lessons.
    With that said, my children (ages 8, 6, 5) help with lots of things around the house. Each day they are each responsible for making their beds, tidying their rooms, washing down the sink after brushing teeth, clearing away their dirty dishes (rinsing and putting in dishwasher), and keeping their toys in order.
    Very often, the kids and I fold the laundry together (as we fold we pray for each person in our
    family as we fold their clothes).
    On cleaning days, they dust and clean door knobs and light plates with antibacterial wipes. I do all the heavier cleaning…though my 6 yr old volunteers completely on his own to mop for me and loves having the authority to tell everyone they can’t walk on it afterward.
    My boys also love bringing the garbage pails in the back for dad and getting the mail.
    Most nights they set the table and every once in a while I ask them to help me clear the whole table. They also help by putting the silverware away when it is time to unload the dishwasher and walk the dog when she needs to go out.
    We don’t give allowance for chores, as we believe pitching in as a team and keeping our house in order is one way to glorify God and give Him thanks and praise for all that He blesses us with.
    We do give “tickets” for godly character traits and a certain number of tickets can be traded in for rewards or they can be up saved for larger rewards.
    You’ll find that young children LOVE to help. Especially with things they consider “grown up jobs.” And they learn so much about teamwork and serving others in the process. I think they also really learn to appreciate all they have.

  • Hayley22478

    My boys are 5 and 6 and they make their beds each morning (except weekends!), help set and clean off the table, help fold and put away laundry (one loves matching socks which I find very tedious!), and they sometimes ask for extra chores if they’d like to earn money for things like tattoos :) They buy temporary ones to support the football team at school most Fridays! They also clean their own toilets about once a week – they’re boys – it’s bad.

  • Joscelyn

    Angie,

    My 5 yr old loves to dust, clean windows, & help do the dishes (he isn’t about picking up though) and my 10 yr old takes out the trash, picks up, & helps dust, vaccum, e.t.c. I have been very leinient on their chores as of late, but I am cracking down on them. Oh & the 10 yr old picks up his clothes too.

  • Michelle Miller

    My 9 and 7 year old boys help with pretty much everything around the house and have been for a few years. I break them down so they each have a few chores a week, then we switch the next week so it doesn’t get to monotonous for them. Collecting all the garbages and taking to big bin outside, dusting, vaccuuming, taking hampers to laundry room and putting their clean laundry away, feeding and walking the dog, pulling weeds and garden work, doing dishes, setting/clearing the table for meals etc. Of course, I am helping in some capacity as well since we are a team. I make a chore chart that they can check off when they are done and they love doing that. Rewards are movie night on the weekend or some cpt time for educational games.

  • Kim

    Our almost 4 year old earns commission by bringing his dishes in to the kitchen for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, feeding the dog her 3 meals a day, picking up his toys before nap and bed, and throwing his laundry down the chute.

    He helps out sometimes by taking his folded laundry into his room, sweeping (not really well), and making his bed.

    We started the above mentioned commission-earning chores when he turned 3, we plan to adjust his chores when he is 4.

  • Lori

    Hi Angie,
    My 5 kids range in age from 19-8 and chores is a daily thorn. I think back to when I had girls your girls’s age and have such good memories of chore charts and little stickers for them.
    I drew the chore and made a weekly grid, hung a pencil by ribbon right next to the charts and put an envelope filled with stickers too.
    For me it was more about the organization of the chores than the chores themselves. ;o)

    My youngest daughter Sophie is 8 right now. Her main chores are taking the dirty clothes out of the bathroom and sorting it in the laundry room, tidying the livingroom with her older sister and putting away all dishes that go in the lower kitchen cupboards.

    those are things she does daily but she knows how to sweep, dust and wash the dishes also. there is never a shortage of chores is there?

    Hope you find a system that works as perfect as it can for your family.
    Lori

  • http://www.itwasoutoflove.com/home Jim Marr

    Angie,

    I heard the Focus on the Family broadcast today and the description of your visit to your daughter’s gravesite brought back many memories of my visits to my late wife’s gravesite. I too found it difficult to edit my manuscript as I was writing about those experiences that were and still are very emotional. I trust that God continues to heal and guide you each day as you and Todd serve Him.

    Blessings!
    Jim

  • Libtwins

    Hello Angie,
    I just hear you two day interview on Focus on the Family (Boston 590 WEVE). God Bless you and your family.
    Thank you for sharing the story of sweet Audrey. I have placed the link on my facebook page so to share with others.
    Blessings,
    Your sister in Christ
    Libby

  • Jessica Vanroekel

    Hi! I don’t know if you will get to read down through all these comments, but I thought I would give you ideas for chores. This is something I have wrestled with, but feel I am beginning to make headway. I have 4 kiddos, 11yr girl, 8 yr girl, 5 yr. boy, and 3 yr girl and one little one in heaven! Okay–the chores my 8 and 5 year old do are this: set table, empty silverware drawer of dishwasher, clean bathroom mirrors, shake bathroom rugs, clean bathroom sinks, empty bathroom garbages. match and fold socks and undies. The 8 year old dusts. Of course picking up rooms and putting dirty clothes in hamper. Oh and I bought a very cheap hard surface vacuum and all the older kids take turns vacuuming the kitchen floor. anyway, this is what I found the kids are capable of doing on their own after some training time with mom! I hope you can find a plan that works for your family!

    Thanks for posting and sharing God’s story of your life!
    Jess

  • Marcy

    Keepers of their chores is a wonderful tool from Titus 2 Ministries: http://www.titus2.com/ecommerce/products/prod_listing.php/1150

  • Lizan

    My kida are grown now but I used to have them clean their rooms, help fold laundry, share in cleaning (vaccuming/dusting). At age 9 our son asked me (while I was doing it) how to irron so I taught him!! My kids also learned to bake and cook around the time of your twins. I don’t think there’s such a thing as “age appropriate” if they’re old enough for school. I began this process as toddlers..actually…helping to pick up toys and striaghten up their messes.
    When a bit older they cleaned out the dishwasher and put the items away. Also set the table. When our daughter was 7, she took it upon herself to “cook” supper—heating up hotdogs and opening a can of beans and heating them on the stove (which was gas btw). I knew them—time to actually work with her in the kitchen showing her safety and more.

  • Whitney

    Angie, the 2 flower girls that were in my wedding have been in my life since they were babies. I don’t have children of my own but it’s been fun to watch them grow up. The youngest is now 5 and she’s been doing chores for years now! Charts and stickers have worked best for them. They are so excited to show me how many stickers they get each week for completing chores. The 5 year old sweeps, picks up toys, makes her bed, feeds the dog, etc. and the oldest (9) can wash dishes, work the dish washer, and vacuums. Also, I noticed that since not all chores need to be done everyday, they have a chart of what is done each day of the week and Sunday is a “no-clean day!” They leave Sunday open for God and family time. Sounds like a good Sunday to me!

  • Snida777

    I heard you on focus on the family today and I just had to search to see a picture of beautiful miss Audrey. She is gorgeous! My heart grieves with you and everyone else who has to say goodbye to loved ones too soon.
    I am happy to be counted amond the many whose life has been touched by the life of sweet Audrey Caroline and by the power of God and precious love of His son that shines through you (my mom is named Audrey and I named my daughter Caroline so of course I love this name!)
    Oh and how cool is it that on your post where you shared your letter to Audrey Caroline, there are 777 comments? And 3/2 being your husbands birthday? My husband’s birthday is the same day as my parent’s wedding anniversary. My dad passed away 5 years ago and on what would be a day of mourning, God gave us a reason to keep celebrating each March 28. Little winks from heaven :)
    God bless you and your family.
    Stephanie

  • http://jwhite05.blogspot.com Jess White05

    I, too, heard you on the Family Life Network’s Focus on the Family program: I came in at the tail end of the program and just happened to catch your first name, so I googled it and through a series of searches found your blog. What an inspiration you and your family are: My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. ALL of your daughters are absolutely beautiful and precious.

    Jessica
    Life in the White House

  • Jess

    When I started reading and you mentioned Nancy Leigh DeMoss I got excited because we support a girl who works for her ministry. And then to see that you mentioned Liz, who we support was even more exciting! Liz is a friend and you can’t find much better than her! So glad she is continuing to close in on her support goal!

  • Waltjuliek

    Dear Angie, I just heard you on Focus on the Family yesterday afternoon but have been following your blog for some months!
    My husband and I lost our 5 year old son 2 years ago today to cancer. We know your feelings of loss and where you are coming from. I agree with you some folks make silly comments. One has to be gracious about how you reply to them!
    Here is a link to our site for him http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/brendonknight

    Chores – my 3 and 9 year old boys have one chore to do before breakfast, and then others to do during the week. My 3 year old assists in the dishwasher job, 9 year old cleans one section of the bathroom each week. 9 year old has to vacuum house on one day of week and take out trash. There are other daily things like toy tidy up we expect them to do. Need any other ideas i can drop you a line. Have a blessed day.
    Julie knight
    waltjuliek@hotmail.com

  • http://www.houseofhudspeth.blogspot.com Nancy

    I will have to check her out because my name is Nancy Lee, too!!
    Have a safe trip! Praying you will feel calm & God’s words will just flow out of your mouth!

  • http://www.houseofhudspeth.blogspot.com Nancy

    Oh! I ordered the owl dress for my little girl from your best friend & it is so precious ~ she does amazing work!

  • MovinForward1

    Nancy Leigh DeMoss is one of my favorites. She compiled “Biblical Womanhood in the Home” and when I gave my life to Christ, reading the Bible it hit me like a ton of bricks that I had to change everything I “knew” about being a wife. As a woman of God, I had to submit to my husband (I was single at the time, too – it’s too long a story for here) if God was going to bring one to me. That book helped me see what that would and should look like. HUGE help. And…as for the girls and their chores, I change what my 10 year old does (he’s the only child here so I have to watch that I don’t overload him, too) so he’s learning all sorts of facets of housekeeping. At 8 he would prepare and take out the recycling, sweep floors, feed & water the dog, help sort laundry. Now at 10 he sweeps and mops floors, vacuums, handles recycling, rakes leaves, puts away his own clothes, loads & empties the dishwasher, clears the dinner table (and PLEASE..keep in mind it’s only two or three of those chores a week! He’s not my little slave. :) ). It’s amazing how much they can do at that age, if you walk them through it and teach them well – which you will have NO problem doing. They also, usually, love to help and if you change around what they do, it never becomes “work” or their “job.” I always tell Christopher he’s part of the team in this house, we all have to work together to keep the house running well. He loves being a part of that compliment whenever people say something about our house. Now…I’ve written a book (as always…I am so sorry I talk so much!) so I’ll stop after saying – you know your girls, their maturity level and their interests. Make it a game, make them a part of your team and you’ll be amazed at how much they’ll do and be willing to do. They might even ask for more.

  • http://www.ourwrigtingpad.blogspot.com Richelle

    I’m reading “Holiness – The Heart God Purifies,” by Nancy Leigh DeMoss… it is a definite favorite.

    As far as chores – we have 8 kids, live and work in W. Africa w/o local househelp – so our kids have all learned to pitch in and help out. The 15, 13 and 11 year olds can do just about anything their father and I can – bake bread, cook (dishes, sweeping, mopping, bathrooms, dusting), laundry and follow just about any recipe, clean, care for their younger siblings, iron… the older two are starting to work on planning a menu on a budget. Our 9 year old has just begun doing her own laundry, some simple recipes, sweeping, mopping, dishes, cleaning and cutting vegetables and helping make some simple deserts. Our 7 year old picks up, puts away her laundry, helps wash dishes and cleans the kitchen, sweeps. Our 3 & 5 year olds are starting to wash plates, cups and silverwares, dry dishes and put them away, set the table, clear the table, pick up and organize toys, put laundry away, dusting and the 5 year old has begun learning to sweep. The two year old helps put laundry away, carry dirty clothes to the laundry room, picks up her toys, helps make the bed, clears the table – all with assistance, of course.

    Bigger kids spend 45 min to one hour working each day – the others 30-45 minutes, usually… except for our 11 year old who is home schooled this year and learning many of these skills is a part of this home schooling year for her. I love working with our kids – and most of the time, they love pitching in and helping – and it is nice to work and chat as we do about all sorts of things. I love that it teaches them to serve each other – as one will hang another’s laundry b/c of a heavy homework load or move furniture for whomever is sweeping, etc.

  • Jennifer Ogle1

    One of my friends told me about this great system and I just ordered it. Wish I could give you personal feedback but the video sounded great and my friend (who is prenant with her 5th ) said it has saved her life! http://www.accountablekids.com/

    I am really excited to get mine!

    Jennifer
    http://www.simpleactsforkids.blogspot.com

  • Bkm2k

    The girls can learn to do anything you want them to do. After teaching them how to do the chore, the secret is…You have to be okay with how they do it. Praise them for the effort and know that as they get older, they will get better at it. And by all means, teach them to make their beds. Unless they have bunks, they can all do it, even at 5.

  • Sharon

    I am the mother of 3–21, 18 and 16. My kids have been helping with house/yard work for years. I don’t think it’s so much finding what’s “age-appropriate” as it is beginning to teach them how to do certain things and continuing to train them unti they can work independently and responsibly. Continue to work with them and teach them, praising and making gentle correction. I think when a job is not done to our satisfaction, we as mothers are able to distinguish ifi it is because of their lack of ability/maturity or just plain laziness. I am amazed at mothers who work like slaves cleaning up after their children and they ask me how do I get my children to help around the house. They didn’t have a c hoice–we work as a family, we have fun as a family (and the two don’t have to be separate).

  • Yvonne

    OK Angie… I wish you had written this post about a month ago… I was looking for your post about breaking the pitcher… my mom needed to go and break a perfectly good piece of pottery so I bought her a pitcher and copied your post for her to read… anyway…. I spent about 3 hours scrolling back through old posts to find it! (that is love and devotion, huh?) I just tested it out and sure enough… “broken pitcher” brought it right up! Ah well, must have been some kind of lesson for me…. patience? perserverence? hummm… I think I have to get back to you on that!

  • Pamela

    When I turned eight my dad came to me and said, “You’re old enough to start doing your own laundry now. Mom will show you how to use the washer and dryer. You will then be responsible for doing your laundry – mom’s not doing it any more.” And that’s what happened. I didn’t do it very often, but I did it. (My mom took over doing my laundry again a year or two later after we moved to a farm and I had critters outside to take care of.) I also know my sister and I were responsible for unloading the dishwasher, making our beds, etc. I don’t remember a lot more than that from when I was that age.

  • Sheilarather

    I have been wondering the very same thing lately. We have a 3yr old boy and 6 yr old girl. They do “little” things but I think they could do more. I did want to suggest something that we started when our daughter was 2. I decorated 3 jars. One each for spending, saving, and tithe. With the money (aka loose change) she got for doing her chores, we sat together and divided it out into those 3. starting with the tithe jar first. We still have those jars and she now loves putting money in them and taking her tithe to church. I was never taught any of these valuable skills growing up so I want my kids to develop them early

  • Aruhome

    Jobs our kids had when they were those ages are: helping to unload DW and put stuff away, keeping their room fairly neat (must have path from door to bed), helping to fold towels, matching socks in the sock box (our son went for quantity, not quality, so getting dressed was an adventure for all of us), feeding the dogs, general kitchen helper during meal prep, lining shoes up by door, etc. Basically, things they could do with little supervision that didn’t have a great consequence if they weren’t done to an adult’s standard – other than wearing mismatched socks a few times! I must say, I really backed off on the room cleaning as they got older (they are now 19, 21, and 23). As long as there was a path from bed to door, I kept my mouth fairly shut. It’s their room. No one else has to see it. And, a good “consequence” they learned is that I don’t go in looking for dirty laundry. As they ran out of clothes, they realized they needed to clean a bit if they wanted anything washed. My middle child started doing her own laundry (and most of the family laundry) in junior high. She stated that she didn’t like how I did laundry (?!?) and would now be taking over. I was fine with that! She did a good job, with lots of small loads – her idea of separating colors was that each color had its own load, rather than lights, darks, etc. It probably wasted water/energy, but keeping the peace with a houseful of teenagers has its trade-offs. My two oldest are now out on their own (one married, one with two room-mates) and both are doing a good job at keeping house.

  • Clyta F. Harris

    I haven’t read the comments you have received, so you may have already read this one. I used to put a child–boy or girl–on one side of the bed with me on the other and teach them to make up a bed–changing sheets or just smoothing the bed. You’d be surprised how fast a little one can learn to do a mitred corner (or “hospital corner” as we called it). After they had learned, I expected them to make their own beds. I still helped them change sheets, as it think that’s a rather big job for a little one. I also let any kid of any age help me in the kitchen–cooking, cleaning, just having fun.

    Now all of my four children are gone, and I’ve started the same traditions with my grandkids. I taught my oldest to make a hospital corner when he was about four years old. My five-year old granddaughter helped me clean the kitchen last weekend. It only took two hours. I could have done it myself in thirty minutes, but it would not have been nearly as much fun. Besides, I’m making memories. When she gets a little older, I’ll let her do it by herself. My only precaution is to isolate all the sharp knives before you start doing dishes. Don’t want any little cut fingers, do we? I love(d) doing chores with my children/grandchildren (6 so far). I applaud you for teaching your girls responsibilities for chores! God bless you and your precious family.

  • Mom2four

    I have 4 children and I have been rotating chores each week for several years. My oldest 3 rotate doing dishes (unloading the dishwasher- some items are left on the counter if they aren’t tall enough to put them), taking out the trash and putting new bags in each trash can and bathroom duty (cleaning the toilet, sink and mirror in THEIR bathroom…I still do the shower stall.) My youngest hasn’t joined the rotation yet, so he is in charge of folding and putting away towels (he uses a step-stool)…I have even taught him the importance of ‘rotation’, so all of the towels get used evenly…LOL! Since bathroom duty is a 1x a week chore, I added walking the dog (either around the block or up and down the sidewalk, depending on the age of the child) as well. They are all expected to put their own clothes away and keep their rooms clean (…I do PREFER to see the floor) all of the time. Just wanted to share what we have been doing at our house. Good luck!!!

  • http://twitter.com/VeraMC VeraMC

    I have a 3 year old and a 5 year old (and an 8 month old… but he’s off the hook for another year or so!) Each of the girls has a “job” that they are responsible for. I change it up every few months, when they get bored. But I can see they take pride in being the person responsible for something in our house. The 3 year old’s job is to set the table at dinner. Other than getting help putting a new table cloth on the table, she can do it all by herself. The 5 year old’s job is to make breakfast for herself and her sister every (weekday) morning. She can get out yogurt and fruit, make toast, microwave pancakes (I make a big batch on Sunday to freeze), toast waffles, microwave oatmeal, and pour cereal. Aside from that, they are just responsible for some of their own stuff – taking their clothes to the laundry room before bath, making their beds, picking up their (shared) room, etc. On cleaning their room, I am already having a hard time – I waver between making them keep it clean and totally giving up because I’m tired of nagging them about it. Also, every night before stories/bed, our whole family spends about 15 minutes cleaning the whole house – everyone is expected to keep moving the whole time, and we get SO much done! We just move from room to room and put anything away that is out of place, do some quick wiping/dusting, etc. When we all do it together, the girls don’t mind at all – they think it’s fun. Much easier than trying to get them to go pick up by themselves!

  • Christie

    I was supposed to go to the conference, and I missed it because of the FLU! ugh…. But I knew, JUST KNEW that God had another purpose for me to be home. I can always rest in the unknown, because He knows!

  • Fernk59

    My kids are now 18 and 21, so they have had jobs around the house for a long time. We started them with official jobs in first grade, although they were expected to help when asked before that. I wanted the jobs to be somethimg that the family really depended on–something for the home, not just for them, so the first job was bringing in the garbage cans from the curb. I also wanted flexibility when I needed it. Assigned jobs were things like garbage and recycling, sweeping the kitchen floor, setting the dinner table. Then, I would (and still do) ask the kids to unload/reload dishwasher, fold clothes, etc as needed. I also weigh this against how much homework they have. When they have a lot of homework, I pick up some of their jobs. But at the same time, if I have a lot of work to do, I might ask them to do more around the house. I wanted them to learn that we help each other in ways that we need.
    We also gave our kids allowance, but it was not tied to their jobs. We told them that in order to get raises in their allowance they needed to show more responsibility. This was done, over time, by doing jobs without being reminded, by doing a better job, by showing initiative–if you see something that needs to be done, just do it.
    I think it worked, because they both help with whatever I ask, and without complaining (usually) or stalling. They learned it takes all of us to make this house run.

  • http://www.alwayscomehome.blogspot.com Kfarwell

    The Mission of Motherhood was so pivotal in changing how I viewed my role as a mother and how I approached my relationships with my children. WOW! I felt like that book was written for me personally. Though I’ve recommended it to others I don’t know anyone who loves it as much as I do…but now I do :o ) !!!

    Have you ever read Passionate Housewives Desperate for God? Oh my. Another must read…quite the same impact as the other. Always will own it. Always will recommend it. Always will gift it.

  • http://www.alwayscomehome.blogspot.com Kfarwell

    he, he! oops…commented on the wrong post about Mission of Motherhood. But since I’m back, one more book in my top faves…Don’t Make Me Count to Three by Ginger Plowman and this handy little calendar style chart that goes along with it. Biblical training for our children by reaching the issues of their hearts instead of focusing on behaviors. SUPER book!